Show Don't Tell - A Reminder....

The reading of fiction is the experience of a dream working at the subconscious level. John Gardner in The Art of Fiction says; vivid detail is the life blood of fiction…the reader is regularly presented with proofs – in the form of closely observed details…it’s physical detail that pulls us into a story, makes us believe. When a writer is ‘showing’ he is suggesting the sensuous detail that draws the reader into the fictive dream. ‘Telling’ pushes the reader out of the fictive dream, because it requires the reader to make a conscious analysis of what’s being told, which brings the reader into a waking state. It forces the reader to think, not feel.

Good prose uses sensuous details. These are the details that appeal to the 5 physical senses – sight, sound, hearing, taste and touch – and the sixth sense the psychic sense. Much bad prose appeals only to the sense of sight. Need to appeal to more of the senses:
He walked into the musty room. An old, metal desk stood forlornly under the window, the wind whistling through the crack in the glass. He touched the surface of the desk, wiping a swath of soft grime from the hard surface. A picture of George Washington hung on the wall at an odd angle, making old George look somewhat odd, intoxicated perhaps.